Smackdown on the Alter

OK, time for a little venting. It's been a rough week in ChurchLand. I was called a hypocrite in a pretty vicious email for no good reason. The whole thing was because of false imformation, but this person wouldn't accept that. I tried to sit and talk with them and they wouldn't hear of it. After I explained the Biblical solution for conflict management in the church, this person's answer was to quit the church (can someone say "blessing in disguise"?).

Here's the question - why are so FEW people willing to handle conflict in a Biblical manner? What is so hard about sitting face-to-face with someone and at least attempting to iron out a tense situation? Why are people so cowardly when it comes to airing grievances to someone's face (as opposed to behind their back or in a nasty email)? This is so frustrating to me! My wife and I have arguements all the time, but it doesn't mean the marriage is dissolving. Can't we view it the same with church family?

I heard someone at a PromiseKeepers rally say, "You have no more right to break fellowship with a brother in Christ, than you do divorcing your wife." I wish my brothers and sisters in Christ took our relationship that seriously and were willing to have tough conversations once in a while. The right thing to do isn't always the easy thing, but it's still the right thing to do.

1 comment:

JeffUnscripted said...

The Bible calls for courage, confrontation, and compassion. (Alliteration completely accidental. No really it was.) Real relationships REQUIRE all of them. The problem is that society promotes the cowardly tossing of verbal grenades and then ducking for cover. It promotes it with self-centeredness. Courage requires the possibility of self-sacrifice. Confrontation means that you just might turn out to be wrong. Compassion is not simply sending a check to help feed children in Somalia, it is the messy process of investing in their lives in a way that might get you dirty. As we all learn to become more distant, isolated, and self-centered, we are less likely to handle disagreements biblically. The biblical perspective on relationships is anything but safe and safe is what most people seem to be looking for.